How to win every argument with a man.

If you’re easily offended I’ll save you the trouble and tell you not to bother reading any further. This also is the case if you are uncomfortable with sexual topics or if you believe frank discussion of sexual acts somehow is demeaning towards one gender or another.

Okay.

I’m giving you your chance...

Just go to another page.

Really, just close the window...

...or click on some other link.

I’m waiting.

Alright, if you’re still around, don’t say you weren’t forewarned and certainly don’t get all indignant on me.

Okay.

So, in the past I’ve spoken about how hard it is for people to remain together. Particularly in our society today. Somehow, there is this image that marriage or long-term relationships are nothing but flowers when the truth is they’re anything but.

I know people who have been married for over twenty, even thirty years and then I have people I know who have called it quits even after they’ve been together for a decade.

One day not too long ago, I was talking to a friend of mine. She’s been married a long time now. I first met her when she was still a newlywed, I think she had only been married for a few months, and today she is passing the twenty-year mark!

Her husband is a good guy too. He used to get on my nerves but through the years I’ve grown to appreciate the kind of person he is. He can be difficult at times but then again all of us have our moments.

My friend and her husband took the plunge and they had kids. As with a lot of couples today, they waited a long time before they actually set about starting a family and when the time felt right they had a bit of trouble getting pregnant.

So, my friend had her first child at 40 and then lo and behold she had twins at 42! The kids are her life. She loves them to death and she‘s a good mom.

The husband? Well, he probably would’ve been okay stopping at the one.

Like a lot of couples who are together a long time, especially those with kids and jobs (since they both work), there are big demands on their time. It’s just part and parcel of living in a society where both parents work and parents as a rule are much, much more involved in their children’s’ lives than they were decades in the past.

A lot of couples face this but the side effect of this is that the couple rarely has quality time for one and other. It just becomes hard to catch those moments of romance or intimacy.

During one period there was a rise in fighting. I don’t mean slap down, drag out brawling or anything of the sort. Just the kind of incendiary words flying back and forth between people over the course of the day. In and of itself it shouldn’t be a big thing but when it becomes the bulk of interaction between two people long-term problems begin to take root.

Of course, a lot of what is at issue is trivial in nature but underlying all of this is a long-simmering animosity that can grow into something more.

So, we got to talking about this my friend and I and knowing her as well as I do (and her husband too) I gave her the secret to win every argument.

It’s as simple as a blowjob.

Women will no doubt groan but most men you ask, if pressed and absolutely honest about it, will tell you it’s a simple truth.

Am I saying that men are smart? No.

We are simple creatures driven by the basest of urges and quite frankly even if we are all caught up in the anger and emotion of the moment we are hard pressed to ever refuse sex when it is offered up to us.

As I told my friend, you want to win an argument?

Go over to him, unbutton his pants, unzip him, take his dick out and give him a blowjob.

I defy any guy to stay angry at that moment.

Now, my friend of course, doesn’t want to win a fight that way. Thing is though, if you’re with someone, I mean if you love them and everything else and you want them to stay interested in the relationship, what is the problem with a little gratuitous sex every now and again?

Besides, she married the guy!

Anyway, the husband? He was all for it. See, it‘s true as reprehensible as that may sound to a lot of women. Yes, men think about sex that much. You can win every argument with your man if you can just swallow... well, not just your pride.

Anyway, now that I’ve positioned myself as the penultimate sexist pig and pariah let the flame wars begin!

* on an interesting note: I run this through the spell checker in Word if only to avoid looking any less intelligent and was surprised to find blow job actually got caught by the spell checker as corrected to the one word blowjob. Who knew! (2690 Views pre transfer)